After a cursory view of TIME's summary of events, the Generous Citizen points with pride to:

Blear-eyed elephants. (Page 15, column 2.)

Our most precious asset--35,000,000 children. (P. 1, col. 1.)

Bloody subtitles. (P. 15, col. 3.)

A long cruise and no port. (P. 17, col. 1.)

Eleven Bostons. (P. 23, col. 1.)

Nine steaming, sweat-gilded, bloody-eyed finishers. (P. 20, col. 3.)

General Erich von Ludendorff; he did not vote for himself. (P.8, col. 3.)

A Premier, heroically bareheaded. (P. 8, col. 1.)

Humbleness in victory, stoicism in hardship. (P. 1, col. 3.)

A champagne-model gingerbeer bottle. (P. 3, col. 1.)

$100,000 for landscape gardening. (P. 5, col. 3.)