"Best Club"

Several weeks ago the House of Commons sat until the sun had dissipated the dawn. Shaking himself, yawning and stretching, "Dave" Kirkwood, Clydeside Laborite, staggered out of the debating chamber. He had not gone far when his stomach informed him harshly that he must take food.

Eggs and bacon immediately leapt to his mind's eye and he scurried off to the House of Commons restaurant. To his great indignation, he found that breakfast was not served. To his querulous protestation he was informed that sessions of the House lasted until 8 o'clock in the morning only "once in a blue moon."

It is axiomatic in Britain that the House of Commons restaurant is the best club in London. What is more, it is also the cheapest. Before the War it was subsidized by the Treasury, but nowadays it has to pay its own way. How well it does this is told by a few simple figures: last year the restaurant made $500 profit on a turnover of about $185,000.

As a member of the "Kitchen Committee," "Dave" delved into the inner most secrets of the culinary art. He wanted to know why a member had to pay $3 for entertaining a friend at dinner. It was pointed out to him that his colleagues could have dined on "sausages and mash" for 25-c-. He then charged that the price of food was sacrificed to the supply of cheap liquor. This, too, was easily disproved. It is true that Parliamentarians do not drink nearly as much as they used to during the past century when everybody drank and was drunk, but whatever profit is made out of liquid refreshments in the restaurant is immediately applied to reduce the cost of foodstuffs.

"Dave" gave up. His attempts to reform the restaurants were no more popular with his own party than they were with others. He felt obliged to admit that after all the restaurant was perhaps cheap and excellent, even if it did not supply eggs and bacon for breakfast.