Italian Crow

From sleepy medieval Innsbruck the local Italian consul, Signer Riccardi, telephoned tempestuously last week to Rome. Austrian students, he cried, had just wrenched down the flag of Italy from its staff before his window. The vandals! The Austrian swine! They were tearing the tricolor to tatters, spitting on it, fouling it --the voice of helpless Consul Riccardi became a scream. At Rome, according to authoritative reports, Signer Mussolini himself took up his telephone and put searching questions to excited Consul Riccardi. Meanwhile the police of Innsbruck, clubbing right and left, had scattered the mob of flag snatchers after arresting eight. The snatchers, it appeared, were patriotically incensed because a new and larger-than-usual Italian flag had been unfurled, last week, on the 13th anniversary of the day when Italy finally declared war on Austria (see ITALY). The careful telephonic questions of Dictator Mussolini were followed by abrupt commands. Consul Riccardi gulped that he understood, hung up, donned resplendent attire, and fairly strutted to the residence of Provincial Governor Stumpf. There, like a sparrow chirping for an eagle, he voiced the fairly temperate demands of II Duce: 1) Austria to supply a new flag; 2) Austrian soldiers to salute it; 3) Formal apology. Gruff Governor Stumpf, stumped, wired to Chancellor & Foreign Minister of Austria Monsignor Ignaz Seipel for instruc- tions. "Yield," was the substance of the Monsignor's reply. On the same day that the flag had been torn down, it was replaced and saluted by 30 Austrian soldiers, while Consul Riccardi & staff gave the famed rising Fascist cheer, "eia-eia-eia-alala!" for Signor Mussolini. Diplomats deemed the swiftness with which satisfaction was demanded and given virtually a record. As night fell over the stones and spires of Innsbruck, the slumbers of gruff Governor Stumpf were interrupted by indignant student-patriots who assembled and shouted: "Down with our cowardly Government! It seeks to kill national pride!" Crestfallen Austrians lamented that they, defeated & disarmed, must eat Italian crow.