Shiner

In Manhattan, when his wife had him judged incompetent because of senile dementia, it was revealed that Pietro A. Ierardi, bootblack concessionaire in Grand Central Terminal, had amassed $176,500 in 50 years.

Tires

In The Bronx, N. Y., the tires of 200-odd automobiles were slashed and punctured one night, apparently with icepicks. Police went looking for garage racketeers.

Depression

In Chambersburg, Pa. two Pittsburgh businessmen headed for Chicago ardently discussed the Depression, discovered they had traveled east instead of west from Pittsburgh, were 312 mi. off their road.

Wait

In Manhattan, Magistrate Brandt in Tombs Court suspended sentence on 13 intoxicated men. Said he: "Why don't you wait, like I am waiting, until we get the good beer back?"

Fireman

In Zagreb, Jugoslavia, Mije Juritchich shinned up the cross of a cathedral, stood on his head, turned handsprings, danced, got his coveted fireman's job.

Milked

In Lonoke, Ark. Wade Holloway, dairy man, missed his purse containing $777, decided one of his 23 cows had eaten it after milking. He called a veterinary, had two cows opened at $10 each, found nothing, gave up.

Fly

At Washington Park racetrack, Chicago, Paul Bunyan, racehorse, bit at a fly on his chest, bit himself, had to be withdrawn from his race.

Joy

In San Diego, Calif., Mrs. Grace Cleaves, after two months of waiting for the removal of eye bandages, cried: "I can see! Oh, thank God!", died of joyous shock.

Pillar

In Richmond, Va., Judge Julien Gunn has since April 13 refused to move into his new City Hall quarters. Reason: Judge Julien Gunn objects to the presence of one round pillar and one square pillar in his courtroom.

Wettiwet

In Manhattan was captured one John Wettiwet, rum runner.

Beer

In Pilsen, a brewery proprietor drowned himself in a vat of beer. On the vat he had chalked a statement that he died for shame because consumption of his beer had decreased more than 125 gal. during the year. He wrote also to his former customers, threatening to haunt them for their disloyalty.

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.