Respectability

In Birmingham, when Mrs. Ernestine Meeks refused probation for a liquor law violation and began to serve a 60-day jail term, her husband, sometime subpoena server, crowed: "There has been a lot of talk about us having a drag. I want people to know we serve our time in jail like other respectable people."

Hurry

In Kankakee, Ill., trying to flag an automobile roaring into the path of an oncoming locomotive, Crossing Watchman Sam Piuppo, 59, was struck and killed by the car which cleared the front of the locomotive by inches, roared on.

Game

Near Parsippany, N. J., Judson Farrell, 19, and Charles R. Worman, 23, hunting rabbits in the woods, came on two elephants, ran all the way back to town. Disbelieving townsfolk learned that Will H. Hill, circus man, had tethered his wintering elephants outside for a little airing.

Greeter

In Chicago, George Gaw, Chicago's onetime official greeter of celebrities, sued Lake Erie Chemical Co. in vain for $100,000 damages for the loss of the middle finger on his right, greeting hand, when one of the company's tear gas fountain pens exploded in his hand.

Repartee

In Milwaukee, when members of meat cutters union local No. 73 picketed his store with placards saying, "UNFAIR," a butcher hired two fat Negro women to walk beside the pickets carrying bigger signs, "JUST MARRIED."

Target

In Cleveland, arrested for firing a shotgun pointblank at his wife, James Florian, 59, landscape gardener, told police, "I figured she would make a fine target."

Certainty

In Lome township, Ontario, Canada, William Minkinen, 55, leaped from a high rock into Vermillion River, slashing his throat with & knife in his right hand, holding a lighted stick of dynamite in his left. The cut was superficial, the explosion blew off his left hand. William Minkinen died of drowning.

Prank

In Cambridge, Mass., Sophomores Alfred Bunch and Frederick Naegle at Massachusetts Institute of Technology returned from a weekend to find an old Ford truck standing in the centre of their fourth floor room, brought in piecemeal and assembled there by prankster fraternity mates.

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