"Undersoused One-Thirtieth"

On Swarthmore's campus last week sprang up a successor to the Veterans of Future Wars. Undergraduates formed the United Scions of the Aristocracy, claiming 215 members, drafted a program for "uniting the scattered crumbs of the upper crust," planned to agitate for free caviar and champagne for 'Impecunious aristo-crats." First to receive their attention will be the "underfeted and undersoused one-thirtieth of the nation's population." Their legislative aims include pensions for indigent debutantes and for "well-bred worthies who can prove they have never soiled their hands with labor." Cried an aristocracy-rouser: "What will happen to our American culture if our upper crust is robbed of the substance with which to endow art galleries, the opera and racing stables?"

The society's shield: a button bearing a top hat with U. S. A. on the crown and a cane and gloves rampant on a blue field. Its slogan: "He who walks backward never stubs his toe."

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