Dale's Tale. In Richmond Ind., the parents of Dale Allen Hawley, aviation machinist's mate, received a letter from him : "After leaving where we were before we left for here, not knowing we were coming here from there, we couldn't tell whether we had arrived here or not. . . .The weather here is just as it always is at this season. The people are just like they look. I had better close now before I give too much valuable military information."

Spacing. In Warsaw, Mo., Mrs. Leonard Howe gave birth to a daughter. Next day she bore her twin in Kansas City--125 miles away.

No Help Wanted. In Kansas City, a farmhand was advertised for. Said the sarcastic (and successful) ad: "No work to do; must be able to sit in rocking chair on cool, south porch and come to meals unassisted."

Marriageable Molars. In Graham, N.C., Dentist Will Long peered into a young man's mouth, noted "fully developed wisdom teeth, perfect set of molars," therefore judged him over 21. The young man was therefore able to get a marriage license.

Limited. In Camp Stewart, Ga., Private Andrew J. Capariso's commanding officer judged him "limited service material." The C.O. then learned that Capariso had survived 15 months' internment in North Africa, English air raids, shrapnel wounds at Dakar, three torpedoings, 16 days on the Atlantic in an open boat, three days on the Atlantic on a raft with a dead man.

His Own Lights. In Chicago, Mrs. Alice Mischal, 23, got a divorce. She had testified that her husband made her burn candles because he hated the electric company, cook with kerosene because he hated the gas company.

Vultee Vengeance. In Fort Worth, Hobson M. Mack, butcher, charged that Silas H. Strother, Vultee aircraft worker, bit off part of his ear in an argument over the price of pig's knuckles.

Air Apparent. In Cairo, Lieut. George Ponty of Los Angeles, whose grandfather had willed him two Greek islands, briefed a bombing mission over the Mediterranean. Said Ponty, pointing: "Hold your bombs over those chunks of real estate--they belong to me."

Whale's Tale. In Weekapaug, R.I., a dead whale drifted ashore. After calling the Coast Guard (but the whale did not interfere with navigation), the Army (but the whale was not an invasion), town fathers classed the carcass as refuse, called their garbage collector.

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.