Assist. In London, the Board of Trade pondered the occupational requirements of physicians, decided to allow them four pockets in their waistcoats once more.

Coverage Complete. In Los Angeles, WPB Analyst W. H. Alexander headed a new agency whose announced intention was: "To cover the needs of the average American from birth to death, beginning with the supply of diapers and safety pins and ending with the distribution of caskets and tombstones."

Boomerang. In booming Bridgeport, Conn., Federal Bankruptcy Court was scheduled to close at year's end, for lack of business.

Suggestive. Somewhere above the plains of Kansas, Lieut. Ian P. McGreal, lost on a flight, spotted a water tower, thought he saw a town name painted on it, swooped down and read the legend. When he finally reached his destination, the suggestible lieutenant obeyed what he had read: "Go to Church Sunday."

Golden Egg. In rural St. Louis County, Mo., C. B. Oden's neighbors saw a plane fly through a formation of geese, saw one goose drop, promptly trotted over and brought dinner home.

Breaks. Near Canon City, Colo., Lavenia Green was thrown by her horse, broke her leg, crawled five miles to her car, drove 35 miles to a hospital. In Portland, Ore., Paul H. Thorsen, treated for a broken bone in his knee, explained to hospital attendants that a girl friend had slipped and too abruptly sat on his lap.

Rats! In St. Louis, William O. Buettner of the National Pest Control Association revealed the best way to catch rats: bait the trap with porterhouse steak.

Excelsior. In Chicago's new subway, first aid was administered to an old lady who had finally stopped trying to get up a downgoing escalator, had coasted to the bottom and collapsed.

There! In Denver, Irving Gold was drafted out of his $216-a-month job as a civilian instructor at an Army Air Forces clerical school, presently reassigned to the job, at a private's pay.

Slow Men. In Los Angeles, 56-year-old Pickpocket Albert Lewis announced that honest toil was best, even at $5 a week, after he was arrested for the 96th time. In Missouri State Prison, 83-year-old H.O. Chenoweth, a lifer, refused to ask for a parole, held out for just "a little outside privilege, so I can go over to the river and fish." In London, relatives of 86-year-old Thomas Morrell reported him missing, believed he had probably run away to sea.

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