High Life. In Houston, Welder George W. Witters, unable to find a place to live, moved into a comfortable oak tree where his weekly expenditure is $4 for food.

Low Life. In San Francisco, Elmer Dale Cox, unable to find a place to live, was discovered, surrounded by food and a cookstove, in the sub-basement of the house of R. Gwin Follis. Cox explained he had moved in several weeks before when Follis wasn't looking.

I -Agony Column. In Manhattan, a mother inserted an item in the personal notices: "Julius. You're IA. Come home."

Twofers. In Topeka, Kans., Pete Reilly got an idea for a war-bond rally from an 1878 newspaper item: "Hug socials are now the rage. It costs 10-c- to hug anyone between 15 and 20, 5-c- from 20 to 30, $1 to hug another man's wife, bachelor girls two for a nickel, and woman lectur ers free with a chromo thrown in."

Simiantics. In Los Angeles, Mrs. Lee van Belden complained in court that her husband looked like a big monkey when, in the nude, he tried to shoot her with a spoon.

Spirit of 76. In Los Angeles, Mrs. Nora E. Goner filed her candidacy for the Republican nomination for President, gave her occupation as a domestic. Said 76-year-old Candidate Goner: "All my life I have been preparing for this work."

Wheeze. In a Fort Snelling, Minn, medical center, a doctor wandered among unclothed men -- some newly inducted, others newly slated for overseas -- examined one briefly, told him he had asthma, was 4-F. Wheezed the man: "I've been in the Army 15 months, Doc."

Afreud. In St. Louis, attractive Doris Marie Spring appealed to police for protection, said she had married four men in two years (without bothering to fool around with divorces), was now afraid of men.

Disorganized Labor. In Greenburg, Pa., county officials were puzzled by the request of State, County and Municipal Workers of America, Local 287, that county workers be granted 13 paid holidays a year. They were getting 14.

Judas Rates. In Denmark, German authorities advertised for informers, offered $57.90 a week for men, $28.95 a week for women, plus bonuses.

Mufti. In Miami Beach, fashionable Lincoln Road stores offered nice hand-painted neckties for $250 apiece.

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