Straight and Narrow. In Laramie,Wyo., whistling coeds at the State University explained that they were not come-hithering the men, just keeping them off the grass.

Bad Shape. In Lahore, India, a comedian named Durga Mota, 80 lbs. lighter since rationing began, pleaded from a hospital bed for more food, swore he needed 2 lbs. of flour, 60 cups of tea daily to get back to his customary 630 lbs.

Overtime. In St. Louis, Louis Druzinsky, St. Louis Symphony violinist, donned old clothes and dark glasses, fiddled Paganini and Tchaikovsky at a street corner, collected $5.98 in his tin cup in 25 minutes, philosophized: "I ought to quit the Symphony. I can make more money this way."

Always the Lady. In Chicago, Mrs. Bernice Fanelli complained that her estranged husband broke three of her teeth, answered his countercharge that she smashed his spectacles with: "I am a perfect lady. Before I hit him, I told him he had better take his glasses off." Ivy. In Ocoee, Fla., a Miss Gladys Argo became the bride of Army Sergeant Harvard Yale Princeton.

Time's Nick. In Washington, pious Seaman First Class Robert Baker won a free phone call to Louisiana in a Scripture-reading contest, woke his family in time to rescue them from poison gas leaking from a heater.

Mate Rationing. In India's Sind Prov ince a 500-rupee ceiling on dowries produced its inevitable economic effect: a black market in bridegrooms.

After You! In Denver, Hyman Meyers, trying to release his two-year-old grandson from a locked bathroom, tore the knob off the door, ran outside, chucked a rock through a window, clambered into the wrong room, climbed out, tossed another brick, made it, tugged off the rest of the knob on the bathroom door, had to be rescued by the police.

In Absentia. In Trenton, N.J., Civil Service Commissioner William S. Carpenter suggested that leaves of absence should be shorter, cited the example of two Jersey City policemen, on official leave, who had been serving as county investigators for the last ten years.

Look Homeward, Angel. In Long Beach, Calif., Victor Peterson sued for the custody of his four children, claiming that Mrs. Peterson, fearful lest the coastal regions slide into the sea, had fled with her off spring to the sanctuary of a mountain belonging to an evangelist named Everett Lee.

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.