Monday, Feb. 19, 1945

How to Be Roomy

How to Be Roomy. In Kansas City, Kans., a ration board which took an applicant to task for never "sharing the ride" promptly learned the cause of his solitude: "I haul garbage."

Floored. In a Newark, N. J., railroad station, Michael Babich boldly asked an employe for a cigaret, got it, fainted.

Physician, Heal Thyself. In St. Louis.

Internal Revenue agents slapped a lien on belongings of Edna E. Booten. income tax consultant, charged that she was delinquent $1,450 in paying her taxes. In Detroit, firemen of the 12th Street station vainly battled a blaze in their own quarters, finally dashed away and telephoned the fire department.

Chat. In Roanoke, Va., Navy Lieut, (j.g.) Martin Wilbourne, unexpectedly bound for overseas duty, hopped off his train, married the girl awaiting him at the station, hopped back, departed brideless. Elapsed time: 15 minutes.

Cashed In. In Spencer, Mass., Miss Lorraine O'Coin married Pfc. George Buckmaster.

Shortage Reportage. In Kansas City, Mo., somebody broke into Ernie Mehl's auto, made off with a dog bone. In Brook lyn, N. Y., Daniel Tierney was haled into court for lambasting his wife with a beefsteak.

Season's Greetings. In Kansas City, J. C. Huddle, an airways forecaster for the local weather bureau, went hunting, shot a ground hog.

Underdone. In Detroit, 1 7-year-old Mrs. Betty Reid Lavelle divorced her husband for criticizing her "high school cooking," announced she was going back to school to finish her cooking courses.

Pay Dirt. In The Bronx, Aaron Hulah, 65. sued his landlord for $35 damages, testified that he had been barred from taking a weekly bath in the house tub, was thus forced to take 52 round-trip subway rides (a total distance of 1,500 miles) to public baths on the lower East Side for a total expense of 70-c- a week.Ruled Judge Michael Delagi: "Hulah gets the moolah."

Thanks. In Sikeston, Mo., the Standard reprinted a New Mexico widow's card of thanks: "I wish to thank all who so kindly assisted in any way in the death of my dear husband."

Hair Shirt. In Mobile, conscientious U.S. District Judge John McDuffie: 1) went hunting; 2) fined himself $25 for violating the game laws.

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