One to a Customer. In Washington, the Bureau of Internal Revenue brooded heavily over the tax return of a man who had been divorced and remarried the same year, finally ruled, in effect: only one wife (and exemption) per taxpayer.

Light Touch. In Sacramento, Anthony Swinkunas robbed a man of his wallet, examined it in the glare of an auto's headlights, discovered too late that the auto was an occupied police car.

Tch! Temper! In Parks Falls, Wis., Edward Trzcinske, angry at his girl friend, borrowed a bulldozer, butted her house partly off its foundation.

Marathon Hooky. In Brooklyn, Truant Officer Walter O'Leary hunted Hooky Player Louis F. Cianca for three years, finally found him at a blood bank. Ex-Navy Coxswain Cianca had meantime accumulated seven battle stars in the Pacific.

Anything but That. In Detroit, a hotel sued to oust a paying guest because he had too many girl friends. When the housekeeper tried to testify as to what went on in his room, she fainted.

Dudgeon. In Middletown, Conn., Angelo Salafia, classified IA, was fined $100 for painting on his draft-board chairman's sidewalk: "Connell--what have you done for the war effort?"

Yells Better. In Montreal, the four-day-old son of Mr. & Mrs. R. F. Yells was operated on for a throat obstruction.

Cheer Up! In Port Chester, N.Y., the Item prepared [its] readers for the worst with [these] front-page headlines: HEAT

WAVE TO LAST THREE MORE DAYS; HUMIDITY TO REMAIN TOO; THUNDERSTORMS TO SPOIL PICNICS.

Ready for Life. In Cleveland, after 17 years of attending night classes, 66-year-old Mrs. Eugenie Hartzell finally got her A.B. from Western Reserve University, observed: "I'm sick of exams."

Apt Description. In Union City, N.J., a young woman whom Walter Blazeck had picked up robbed him of $150, and his car.

When police asked him to describe her he offered: "Over-attractive." Reunion Suits. In Waterloo, Iowa, a businessman was delighted to find his favorite prewar brand of underwear at a church rummage sale, bought some, found they were his own castoffs.

One Way. In Columbus, Ohio, Prisoner Earl Pritcherd, washing walls, found the jail's safe open, removed $600, spent $50 of it to hire a lawyer, who sprung him out of jail.

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