Heavenly Day. In Gering, Neb., Carl Honey married Velda Angel.

Testimonial. In Covington, Ky., City Commission Candidate Elmer C. Drahmann announced that he had been endorsed by a local Liars' Club.

Special Delivery. In Miami, Dr. Manning J. Rosnick broke his leg on the way to the hospital, carried on, delivered an 8-lb. baby while balancing on one leg.

Imperfect Crime. In Seattle, three housebreakers fell to doodling on a type writer, left their names and addresses.

Home Front. In Tipton, Okla., Jess Grubb, home from the wars, spotted a man in a tree near his house, grabbed his gun from force of habit, captured an es caped German prisoner.

Stem to Stern. In Portland, Ore., Jitterbug Ray Harrigan started cutting a rug with a toothpick in his mouth, ended up in a hospital with an intestinal perforation.

Progressive Education. In Raritan Township, N.J., the board of education ruled that, since smoking had become a generally accepted practice, the faculty of Oak Tree School might smoke between classes, in the boiler room.

Gun-shy. In Salt Lake City, the Crime Prevention Bureau reported that its col lection of toy pistols (for the amusement of lost children) had disappeared.

Damyankees. In Columbus, Ohio's Pardon and Parole Commission decided to let Phil Sheridan go free, keep Robert E. Lee locked up.

Crashing Success. In Albert Lea, Minn., a rescue squad revived Ralph Booen, after he tried out his new device for asphyxiating rats.

Blithe Spirit. In Elizabeth, N.J., Philip J. Reiss was just asking a judge to have his long-missing wife declared legally dead when in she walked -- and announced that she didn't even know he had been looking for her.

Odds: 14-to-1. In Ellensburg, Wash., 420 Central Washington College girls ran off a raffle to decide who would get the 30 available boys for a hayride.

Monkey Business. In Portland, Ore., several monkeys in the zoo found some walnuts, discovered that the natural stain in the husks made a fine cosmetic, painted themselves gaudy greens and golds. In New Orleans, a pet monkey, egged on by two small boys, climbed into an "iron claw" slot machine, garnered $60 worth of clocks, fishing reels, and other knickknacks.

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