Fundamentalists. In Oklahoma City, fifth-graders polled on punishment preferences voted 34 to 1 that they would rather have a spanking than a friendly talk.

Bosom Companion. In San Antonio, Jail Matron Mamie Lyons frisked a new arrival, shook a pet tarantula out of her brassiere.

Break, Break, Break. In Saginaw Bay, Mich., John Sanborn, out for some ice fishing, stood by helplessly as 1) his car fell through the ice; 2) a wrecker sent to the rescue fell through the ice; 3) a curious pilot landed his plane, which fell through the ice.

Economy Measure. In Baltimore, Philip Epstein paid $1 and costs for slugging a hypnotist, whom he accused of causing Mrs. Epstein to yearn for "castles in the air. . . trips to Cuba."

Safety Deposit. In Hollywood, Calif., police rescued Patricia Pedden, 40, whom a stranger had 1) robbed, 2) stuffed tightly in a garbage can.

Detail. In Rockymount, Va., volunteer firemen ran to the engine house to answer an alarm, there discovered that none of them knew how to drive the fire truck.

Close Squeak. In Rochester, N.Y., Elliott T. Baker searched his house from top to bottom for that annoying squeak, finally found it in the clips of his suspenders.

Out of Focus. In Detroit, Douglas C. Giles, working as a civilian photographer's assistant, told the FBI that he had deserted the Army because of "the utter monotony of. . . working with cameras day after day."

Correction. In Boston, City Registrar Michael J. Manning regretfully turned down a woman who wanted her birth date changed from 1909 to 1913.

It's Like This. . . In Springfield, Mass., Joseph A. Passineau was acquitted of drunkenness when he explained that he was a bulldozer driver, persuaded the jury that his stagger was really an "occupational sway."

Pinnacle. In New London, Conn., Navy Commander Eugene B. Fluckey (Congressional Medal of Honor, Navy Cross with three gold stars, two unit citations) earned the necessary merit badges, at 34, to become an Eagle Scout.

The Oppressed. In Akron, an eleven-year-old boy admitted to police that he had set fire to his schoolhouse in three places, explained that Teacher James Appleby had made him brush his teeth.

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