Extenuation. In Detroit, Victim John Zissi asked the judge to be lenient with the two holdup men charged with robbing him, because they had been "very polite."

True Colors. In Chicago, police explained how they had caught James E. Glore impersonating a sailor: he was wearing two-toned sport shoes.

Fast Friends. In Pasadena, Calif., when Robert Dwyer and Robert Chapman rushed happily to greet each other after a long parting, Dwyer broke his leg, Chapman cracked his" skull.

Convalescence. In Sydney, Australia, police were looking for the victim of a motorcycle accident who stole the ambulance that was taking him to the hospital.

Cheez It! In Dayton, when cruising Patrolmen W. L. Fealy and D. T. Carroll were ordered to investigate a horn that was stuck, they were forced to radio back: "It's us."

Definition. In Rochester, England, the city food-control committee decided not to prosecute a food vendor when it learned from the Ministry of Food that "meat pies aren't required to contain any meat at all."

Well Off. In Indianapolis, Lifer Walter Seward, paroled from the Indiana State Prison after a total of 22 years, was so shocked at the high cost of living that he persuaded the Division of Correction to send him back to jail.

Red Star. In London, Amateur Actress Beryl Lund complained that she had been suspended from her government job on suspicion of being a Communist, after she had appeared in a play called What's Left.

See? In Atlanta, during a demonstration to show schoolchildren what to do in case of fire, seven firemen were overcome by smoke. In Clarkston, Wash., Golf Professional Joe Durgan, showing Pupil Howard Melcher how to swing a golf club, shot his first hole-in-one.

Holy See. In Wellington, New Zealand, several parishioners, with painful burns on their foreheads, complained that someone had put caustic soda in the holy water.

Civil Servant. In Holyport, Buckinghamshire, England, superstitious Postmaster James Thomas delayed delivering 13 congratulatory telegrams to newly weds Mr. & Mrs. Richard Lancaster-Burgess until he could compose a 14th of his own.

Pound of Cure. In Baltimore, the local chapter of Alcoholics Anonymous moved into new offices in the Bromo-Seltzer building.

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