Monstrous. In Milwaukee, Arno Frankenstein petitioned for a change of name because people keep phoning and asking to speak to the monster.

The Criminal Mind. In Pontiac, Mich., Mrs. Opal E. Caughell told police, that when the burglar who entered her house was assured that she had no money, he settled for a ham sandwich. In Kansas City, Mo., police were looking for a youth who kidnaped 59-year-old Mrs. Sadie Crosner, took her money and car, then kissed her gently on the cheek with the observation that she reminded him of his mother. In Redding, Calif., Dick Farnsworth found a note on the door of his rifled store: "Get a new lock; this one is too easy."

R.U.R. In Dallas, 40-year-old J. B. Faucher complained to the court that he had wanted his son to grow up strong, had built the boy a set of barbells for weight-lifting exercises, eventually found that his i 19-year-old had become a "monster and a bully who orders me around . . ."

Could Be. In Houston, police issued a traffic ticket to 23-year-old Farmer Ought To Be Minifee, later made out another for his brother, Must Be Minifee.

Hearth & Home. In London, Alexander Richards, suing for divorce, charged that his wife made life so unbearable that he took a job at the British embassy in Moscow after she had stuffed his best suit up the chimney and snipped the bristles off his shaving brush. In Atlanta, a divorce plaintiff reportedly told the judge that he was already separated from his wife: "She fired at me five times, your honor. I started separating on the first shot. By the fifth shot, your honor, I had completely separated." In London, Raymond Steiner was granted a divorce after charging that his wife hit him with a milk bottle, smashed a tumbler on his head, knocked out one of his teeth with a plate, battered him with a shovel, yanked him downstairs by one leg, scratched him, pushed a lighted cigarette in his face.

Power of the Pen. In Cleveland, Roy Sparmon, in jail awaiting trial on forgery charges, faced three more similar charges when officials caught him passing bum checks to buy himself cigarettes and magazines. In Roanoke, Va., a few days after M. E. Lisic was released from jail, police rearrested him on charges of forging a check to pay his $5 fine.

Thirst. In Seattle, a grocery clerk explained why he had stolen some $4,200 from his employer: "I like to drink beer."

Close to Home. In Cleveland, police investigated an accident involving a Police Accident Investigation car.

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