Ready, Aim, Fire!

In Colorado last week the big-game season opened with a bang. Some 100,000 huntsmen (the manpower of more than six full-strength divisions) made a mass assault on the Rocky Mountains west of Denver. The weather was a bit too warm, foliage cut down visibility, and there had been no early snows to drive deer and elk from the high areas. But the early-season shooting was fairly good nonetheless. Stalking through the valleys, over barren ridges, through clumps of quaking aspen and oak brush, across rocky peaks, the luckier hunters had plenty of chances at game.

Their crashing fusillades prompted worried ranchers to stable their saddle horses, bring the stock closer to home. One rancher tied red ribbons on the antlers of his pet deer, explained: "Without these, all of 'em would shoot at him; with these not more'n ten dudes'll kill him at the same time." Seasoned huntsmen worried about "sound-shots." Explained one: "A sound-shot is a weird guessing game invented by city men. They hear something in the brush and shoot. Then they look to see what they got. It's just as apt to be their old lady as an animal."

One hunter hit the jackpot 30 minutes after he got out of his car. In that time he killed a 600-lb. bear, a 700-lb. elk, a 225-lb. deer. Others were not so lucky. By the fifth day of the 17-day season, Colorado's casualty list read: six dead, four from gunfire, two from heart attacks. That was only the beginning; in most deer-hunting states the season has not yet opened. If 1950 follows the pattern of 1949, some 500 big-and small-game hunters throughout the U.S. will have been shot to death by Christmas.

The prospect of the annual carnage prompted Reporter Jack Mohler of Denver's Rocky Mountain News to write an open letter. Instead of the customary "Be Careful" warnings, Mohler switched to the sardonic, listed nine bits of inviting-the-undertaker advice. Samples:

"Load the family buggy down with all the loaded guns you can cram between the legs of the guys in the back seat. Be careful that all safeties are off."

"Shoot at everything that moves."

"If you're getting on in years, here's one that'll kill you. Find the toughest, highest country possible."

"Get lost. It adds to the confusion and often results in death."

Concluded Mohler: "When the season is over, and you've bagged your limit, tie your partner to the fender of your car and come home. He'll look lovely over the mantel."

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