Object Lesson. In Omaha, after Harry Marble parked his car in a properly metered place behind the post office, police removed the meter, installed a "Bus Zone --No Parking" sign, ticketed Marble's car.

Hair of the Dog. In Inglewood, Calif., when George D. Pauly dropped a 50-lb. cake of ice on his toe, a doctor advised: "Go home and keep your foot in an ice pack."

Specialized. In Baltimore, Contractor Christian P. Sorensen advertised for bricklayers and got no response, advertised a second time for left-handed bricklayers and was swamped with answers from right-handed ones pretending to be lefthanded.

Modest Proposal. In London, the Chelsea Borough Council abandoned plans for a big electric sign along the Thames waterfront after Councilor Margery Thornton argued: "Let us leave a little darkness for the lover and his lass."

Star Turn. In Detroit, Mrs. Cecil Jewell won a divorce after testifying that her husband often came home from saloons at 4 a.m. and demanded that she put on a one-woman floor show, which lasted "until 9, or 10 o'clock in the morning, or until I got too tired to dance any more."

Definition. In Sunderland, England, Thomas Boyle, 45, walked into a department store and stole a toy six-shooter for one of his children, told police who arrested him: "The counter service was too slow, and that's criminal."

Delayed Reaction. In Van Nuys, Calif., Ironworker Elba Virgil Norton, 32, failed to convince police, who arrested him for drunken driving, when he insisted: "I am not drunk. I'm just still shaking from the earthquake."

Fair Deal. In Muncie, Ind., David B. Blazer's will provided $15 for the minister, $10 for the church, $2 each for those who participated in his funeral, and $5 each for those who called on him before he died.

Professional Touch. In Greenfield, Mass., Stanley Mislak, 34, paid a $5 fine for passing a stop sign, then went back to his job erecting stop signs for the state.

Man Around the House. In Knoxville, Tenn., Bakery Worker Charles D. Langston, 140 lbs., sued his wife (who weighs "one-eighth of a ton") for divorce, charged that she 1) made him prepare breakfast and dress the baby, 2) beat him until his legs were "raw meat," 3) demanded that he rinse the clothes four times when he did the Friday-night washing, although "this was not a sanitary idea of hers, but merely to harass me."

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.