Scale of Values. In Toledo, police arrested (and later acquitted) Fortuneteller Addie D. Heller, 40, for charging $1 to predict the future, $5 to reveal lucky lottery numbers, $10 for surefire advice on how to get a husband.

Burning Question. In Jersey City, N.J., during a heat wave, the Rev. Paul N. Jewett erected a sign in front of his Emory Methodist Church: "Now that you know how hot Hell is, what are you going to do about it?"

Gravitation. In Hastings, Neb., arrested for reckless driving, a motorist told Judge Joseph Hallman: "Well, sir, I guess I was thinking about politics and just naturally drifted a bit to left of center."

Mission Accomplished. In Richmond, sent to deliver a telegram to the medical college of Virginia Hospital, Western Union Messenger Paul Allen, 18, collapsed from heat exhaustion three blocks from his destination, was taken to the hospital in an ambulance, revived and delivered his telegram.

To the Letter. In Omaha, instructed by Mrs. Hubert Miller to "move anything not nailed down," Mover's Helper George R. Bickel was arrested two hours later for carting $4,725 worth of her jewelry to his hotel room.

Default. In Salt Lake City, John W. Marx, suing for divorce after two years and ten months of marriage, charged that his wife Maria has "failed, neglected and refused to provide the plaintiff with necessities of life."

Testing. In Columbus, Ohio, Walter Doring, chief chemist for the State Department of Liquor Control, was found guilty of drunken driving.

Subtotal Recall. In Denver, when detectives asked six boys, aged nine to 13, about the 40 burglaries they had committed, their leader angrily replied: "How do you expect us to remember? We pulled some of those jobs when we were just little kids."

The Pal. In Washington, D.C., after lending his new De Soto to his friend Thomas Cole, Kyriacos Timotheou took a look under the hood, found that his new engine had been replaced by an old 1950 model, asked police to arrest Cole, who explained: "I put the motor in my car to break it in and was going to give it back ..."

Face-Saver. In St. Jean La Joterie, France, missing for almost a month, Farmer Franc,ois Marchand turned up well and cheerful at his home, told distressed relatives that he had been in the loft of his barn all the time: "I wanted to grow a beard in private."

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