Workout. In Baltimore, charged with turning in three false alarms, Alvin Anay angrily explained: "I don't like to see firemen sitting around. If they don't get exercise, they get stale."

Clean Sweep. In Littleton, Colo., police nabbed Pest Exterminator Edward Meier after he answered a call from Store Owner Rudolph Lemcke, efficiently cleared the premises of all mice and cockroaches, plus $700 in cash.

Thorn of Plenty. In Phoenix, Ariz., Mrs. John Henry called in private detectives to track down the people who were responsible for sending her three sweaters, two pairs of tailored levis, a $5 basket of gold chrysanthemums, a wedding cake, and a maternity wardrobe--all C.O.D.

Abstraction. In Seattle, John E. Trimmer told police that he had bolted his apartment door, put $40 in a sock, put the sock on his foot and crawled into bed, next morning woke up to find the sock still on his foot, the $40 missing.

Objection Sustained. In Gastonia, N.C., Judge George Patton declared a mistrial when a front-row juror broke into Defense Attorney P. C. Froneberger's loud-voiced arguments to complain: "I don't want you hollering in my face."

Hobby. In Indianapolis, a burglar broke into the United States Envelope Co. for the sixth time in nine months, left behind a note: "I do not steal for money. Just for a pastime. Thank you."

Life with Mother. In Milwaukee, Rudolph H. Kroetz got a divorce after he charged that his wife Helen had 1) started a fire in his bedroom when he refused to get up at 2 a.m. to talk to her, 2) slammed a door in his face, shattering the glass, 3) broken a bottle over his head.

The Puritan. In Arlington, Texas, after telling police how he and two companions had robbed a bank of $26,000, Prisoner George Gallo declined a cigarette, primly explained: "I don't have any bad habits."

Reaction. In Buffalo, charging third-degree assault, Mrs. Arnold Kleindienst testified that, after she shoved a spoonful of hot cauliflower into her dozing husband's mouth, he "exploded from under the bedclothes," punched her in the jaw, mocked her down and placed his foot on her neck "with considerable force."

Chain of Command. In Newcastle, England, Farmer Charles Silvertop, 36, fined -L-150 ($420) for drunkenly persuading the pilot of a chartered plane to dive at a ship in the Irish Sea, explained: 'While the captain of the ship is always the captain, I regarded myself as the admiral, having chartered it."

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