Sampling Method. In Meriden, Conn., Gordon A. Sanderson, 31, nabbed after police found him peeping in the windows of houses on Gilbert Road, protested that he was considering moving into the area and just wanted to make sure that his neighbors would be "quiet, decent people."

The Careful Shopper. In Denver, charged with stealing two suits from a store, Elmer Blakely explained that he had taken the clothes "to examine them under natural light," tried to elude a female store detective only because "I first thought she was my estranged wife."

R.S.V.P. In Nashville, gunmen held up the First Industrial (loan) Corp., took $1,374, escaped through an office door marked: "Need more money? Just ask."

Copilot. In Los Angeles, after arresting Lyle Gann for drunken driving, police searched his car, in the trunk compartment found his wife Wilda, who explained: "I knew he would get drunk, so I stowed away so I could drive him home . . ."

Sales Talk. In Sacramento, boasting that he was due to inherit $5,000,000, House-to-House Salesman Lee Capell promised prospective customers a year's free milk and free home sites, confessed, after sheriff's deputies caught up with him for driving a car without a license: "You get to lying, get carried away and start believing . . ."

The Campaign. In Chattanooga, running for district constable, Pleasant Hixon announced: "The office of constable is an obsolete institution ... If elected, [I will] take this obsolete office out of circulation . . ."

Emergency Measure. In Billings, Mont., explaining why he had been arrested five times for drunkenness this year, Paul Rides-the-Horse, 28, a Crow Indian, told the judge that he had merely been following a friend's toothache remedy: "Keep whisky on the tooth at all times."

The Proprieties. In Sydney, Australia, the New South Wales transport department issued 7,000 cut-rate streetcar and bus tickets for children, on each ticket printed the warning: "Do not smoke in a nonsmoking compartment."

Around the Corner. In Baltimore, seeking the Republican nomination for governor, Tim Bright defined what he meant by "100% prosperity": "Chicken legs raining around this state like a snowstorm in Chicago . . . turkey gravy dripping . . . like Niagara Falls . . . porterhouse steaks for breakfast," then sat down with his audience to a supper of frankfurters and lemonade.

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.