Martyr. In San Francisco, Mailman Charles W. O'Brien, 62, charged with tearing up third-class "junk" mail (merely addressed to "occupant" or "boxholder") and then throwing it down a sewer, was let off with only a year's probation by Federal Judge Louis E. Goodman, who remarked: "Maybe he was performing a public service."

Induction. In Milwaukee, sheriff's deputies investigating a burglary at Brynwood Country Club noted a child's sled missing, followed the runner tracks for five miles, finally found Claude W. Harmon, 33, doggedly trudging along pulling a sledload of three cocktail tables, two end tables, twelve tablecloths, 31 napkins, one wastebasket, one topcoat, assorted glass and silverware.

Acquired Taste. In Baltimore, Herbert Jackson, 62, was awarded a divorce from Mrs. Bonnie Jackson, 54, after he explained that he had answered her lonely hearts ad describing her as 5 ft. 4 in. and 118 Ibs., was taken aback to find that she "was about 450 Ibs. and over 6 ft. tall," and that although he "tried to handle her as best I could," she proved "too much for me when she grabbed the kettle and scalded me, and then shot at me and then left me, saying I didn't appreciate a fat woman."

Wrong Combination. In Syracuse, N.Y., ex-Convict Russell Bryant, 51, was unable to force a railroad-office strongbox, spent $31 in taxicab fares hauling it around to friends who also failed to open it, in disgust tossed it into the Seneca River, learned to his dismay after being arrested and sentenced to 20 years that it contained $13 in postage stamps and 44 pencils.

Tongue Looseners. In San Francisco, when Police Officers Milton Piro and Clem DeAmicas spotted and approached a stolen Cadillac, the two cigar-smoking teen-agers inside complained that they were hungry, promised to talk if they were fed, after one order of waffles led the officers to a stolen stripped-down car in an alley, after the second order led them to another car, after the third order produced two more and were turned over to juvenile authorities.

Holiday Spirit. In Rutland, Vt., Laborer Robert Woodward. 37, well fortified with alcohol, decided to pay a holiday visit to his 71-year-old, bedridden mother at East Poultney, lost control of his dump truck on a curve as he was approaching his destination, caromed off a tree and into his mother's cottage, knocked the cottage off its foundation and his mother out of bed and into the arms of son Ronald, with whom she was conversing, was hauled into court and pleaded guilty to charges of driving while drunk and without a license.

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