Names make news. Last week these names made this news:

Arriving in New York to accept a public-service award from the Global News Syndicate, hatless Vice President Richard Nixon displayed the sure political instincts of a seasoned campaigner, in an impromptu 1-hour-and-45-minute tour of Harlem. With an entourage of Global News executives, city detectives and secret service men, Nixon drove to 125th Street and set out on foot, stopping to ask several children about the Dodgers' winning streak, whirled in and out of the offices of the weekly New York Age Defender, paused in the next block to chat with a sidewalk watermelon vendor and assure him that he loved watermelons but did not have time to eat a slice just then. At the Carver Federal Savings and Loan Association, he accepted a new half dollar with the likeness of George Washington Carver on it, then whipped--around to the United Mutual Life Insurance Co. to deliver a little talk to the staff on the value of life insurance and a stable dollar. Nixon was driven to the Harlem branch of the Y.M.C.A., where he inspected the men's and women's lounges, watched a swimming lesson in the pool. After poking his head into the gymnasium to see two boys dribbling basketballs, he returned by car to the Hotel Theresa and, not noticeably winded, set to work on his speech.

Sheikh Ahmed Salem, 80, Egypt's shortest man (2 ft. 4 in.) traveled from his home in Upper Egypt to Cairo seeking Premier Gamal Abdel Nasser's help in recovering his stolen life savings, was photographed at the Presidency of the Council of Ministers solemnly paying his respects to Egypt's husky (6 ft., 200 Ibs.) strongman, who ordered police to investigate the theft immediately.

In Britain, ex-Governess Marion ("Crawfie") Crawford, who parlayed her 16 years' experience with Britain's royal family into a bestseller (The Little Princesses), sorrowfully learned one of the hard facts of journalistic life: it is easier to reminisce than to peer into the future. In her column for London's weekly Woman's Own, Crawfie richly described Queen Elizabeth s and Princess Margaret's appearance at this year's Trooping the Color at the Horse Guards parade ("The young princess had some difficulty in persuading her mount to settle down. But it was done . . coolly and decisively"). She also painted a vivid word picture of the scene at this year's Royal Ascot races ("an air of enthusiasm about it never seen be fore"). There were only a couple of things wrong with the story: neither event ever took place. Because of the British railroad strike, both were canceled, but not in time to catch Crawfie's column, which goes to press six weeks be fore it comes out.

In London, Sir Winston Churchill donned top hat and frock coat and turned up at the City's ancient Guildhall for the unveiling of a larger-than-life statue of himself by Sculptor Oscar Nemon. After one look he commented approvingly. But later, Author Gerald Hamilton, 67, a self-confessed "black sheep" of his family, interned in both World Wars for pro-German sympathies, announced that he had modeled for the body of the statue.

True enough, said Sculptor Nemon, when confronted with the story. Because Churchill's time was limited, he had asked Hamilton, who is about the same build, to pose for the 60-odd sittings in which he worked on the body. "I meant no disrespect," said the unhappy sculptor.

Churchill reportedly grumped: "Couldn't they pick anyone else?" Only Model Hamilton seemed undisturbed. Chuckled he: "I must say the situation tickled my sense of humor." Passing through London on his way to the U.S., Prime Minister U Nu of Burma, quietly garbed in his traditional national dress, stopped backstage after a performance of Kismet, was caught by photographers in smiling conversation with Actress Joan Diener, garishly resplendent in a state of pseudo-Eastern undress.

Minot F. ("Mickey") Jellce, 25, playboy heir to a $3,000,000 margarine fortune convicted for the second time of enticing Pat Ward and attempting to induce Marguerite Cordova to lead lives of prostitution, entered Sing Sing to begin serving a two-to three-year sentence.

Wandering through Tennessee to collect material for some columns on the Dixon-Yates-TVA hassle, peevish Hearst Columnist Westbrook Pegler cast an uncharacteristically mellow eye about him, rhapsodized about the virtues of hometown baseball ("A . . . means of blowing off steam . . . You pour it on the umpire . . . and get it off your own chest"), confided that he is really a liberal at heart: "I'm the kind of guy they used to call a liberal. In those days, a liberal said to the other guy, 'You leave me alone, and I'll leave you alone.' I believe in that." And what did he think of Dixon-Yates? Snarled Liberal Pegler in a sudden return to form: "I don't know who made the Godawful bull of locating that plant where that lousy racket union is located . . . I intend to find out."

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