A Gothic Tale. In London, the Admiralty granted Leading Seaman Walter W. Hampson leave, flew him to his Plymouth home from Malta after his wife complained their house had been haunted for the past two months by a terrifying, headless, black and white phantom.

For Worse. In Ventura, Calif., Police Lieutenant Ray Rude arrested Lenwood Andrew Jeanne as he left a wedding chapel with his new bride, impounded the wedding ring, accused Jeanne of purchasing it with a bad check, booked him on suspicion of forgery.

Savoir-Faire. In Detroit. Arnold L. Humphrey, 20, got a ten-day jail sentence for reckless driving after police spotted him perched on the door of his convertible with his legs dangling above the street, while he steered with one hand, worked the brake and the accelerator with a tree branch held in the other.

Liquidated. In New Bern, N.C., after Hurricanes Connie and Diane roared over his land. Harlowe Waldrop advertised in the local Sun-Journal: "Have some waterfront property previously listed by the foot or acre, now reduced and offered by the gallon."

The Tender Trap. In Birmingham, police declared their 25-year-old armored car outmoded after they shot it up with carbine rounds in a test, watched the bullets easily rip through one side of the car, dent the other.

Shoal Waters. In Mobile. Ala., Seaman John W. Jones sued the United Fruit Co. for $75,200 damages after he wrenched his back fleeing from a snake in his bunk, slipped on a grease smear and fell off an engine-room ladder.

Timber Topper. In Pasadena. Calif., after he flushed a midnight prowler from his house, chased him out the back door and was outdistanced in a dash across the yard. House Owner Ronald L. Miller watched while the burglar easily hurdled the back fence, noticed that he wore a pair of spiked track shoes.

Peekaboo. In Cleveland, Common Pleas Court Judge Samuel Silbert ordered Lazo Gasic, 40, to find a new home during divorce proceedings after his wife Johanna, 35, explained: "He's extremely jealous--he lifts up my folding bed several times a night expecting to find someone under it."

No Time for Sergeants. In Seoul, on Korean duty since April 1954. Sergeant Samuel Gelfman rushed to clear matters with his company commander, hurriedly informed Pacific Stars & Stripes that his home-town newspaper had erred when it printed a report stating that he had just spent a weekend sunning himself at Ocean Beach, NJ.

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