The Egomaniacs

The typical successful TV comic is either Irish or Jewish, earns more money than the President of the U.S., and is likely to suffer from egomania, insomnia and, especially, vertigo--i.e., a morbid fear of falling from his high Nielsen rating. In a new book, The Funny Men (Simon & Schuster; $3-95), published this week, TV Comic Steve Allen, who labors to be funny five nights a week on NBC's Tonight, outlines the terrors of his trade and takes a measuring look at 16 of his competitors. Since he began work on the book, one of the 16 (Fred Allen) has died, four others have lost their regular programs, and two more may not be back on the air next season. "People get tired of you a lot quicker on TV than they do on radio," laments Allen. "They pick you up faster, but they drop you faster, too."

What makes the whole business maddening, Allen observes, is that no one--from Aristotle to Freud--has yet worked out a satisfactory definition of humor. Allen concludes that the relationship of the TV fan to his favorite comic is a little like falling in love. Within six months the honeymoon is over. After a year, the fan begins to mutter critical asides. In two years he may switch to another channel. Allen's purpose in writing his book is to make "an examination and somewhat relaxed analysis of television humor"; his major concern is to give his readers a better understanding of TV comedians, and his devout hope is that it will make TV critics "more humble."

Allen has nothing to say about his own brand of wit, and he curiously neglects such TV headliners as Lucille Ball and Danny Thomas. But his assessments of the 16 funnymen he does deal with are often pungent and always well lubricated with punch lines from their repertories.

Some of Allen's judgments:

Jack Benny: "Basically, an actor of sheer comic genius rather than a true, essential comedian . . . Jack has been on top for a long time by playing 'himself; maybe the fact that he himself is exactly opposite to his public character has a lot to do with his limitless success."

Milton Berle: "Milton is a ham. He does use other people's jokes. He will do anything for a laugh. But the important thing ... is that he gets the laugh . . ."

George Gobel: "He is the wide-eyed innocent looking ... at a frustrating world. His seven-year-old gestures, facial expressions and reactions must be kept 'in the act.' But ... he is not entitled to indulge in the completely unbridled regression to infancy that is allowed Jerry Lewis."

Sid Caesar: "A gifted dialectician, a truly artistic pantomimist and a master of timing ... He is a technically consummate artist."

Wally Cox: ". . . About as physically interesting as an orange crate . . . Cox seems to have been influenced by a rainy afternoon."

Eddie Cantor: "Like Sophie Tucker, he sells yesterday . . . The good old days always seem better than they were."

Jackie Gleason: "Not, at heart, I think, a truly creative comedian. He is rather an exceptionally talented extrovert, an actor who, in a comedy sketch, can deliver funny lines with polish and vigor."

Fred Allen: "Of all the prominent comedians, Allen most closely approached the status of a philosopher . . . Fred's was comedy with a heavy critical content. For . . . some reason, television is the first medium in history not only to put a low price on critical humor but practically to exclude it altogether."

Bob Hope: "Without question the champ all-around comedian."

Jerry Lewis: "He can pull out all the stops in his attack on the audience . . . There is not a person alive who can suppress a guffaw at a perfectly timed pratfall."

Groucho Marx: "Many of the funny things he does would seem pointless coming from someone else . . . There's something about Groucho that makes him funny just standing there . . ."

Phil Silvers: "More vigorous than Hope, he even approaches the physical dynamism of Berle. More than one Broadway musical has coasted to success on the strength of his electric vitality."

Red Skelton: "One of the great clowns of our time but, for TV, his characters lack realism."

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.