Sweet & Sour Polka. In Peking, Radio Peking announced a new song hit in Red China: The Community Dining Hall Is Too Good to Tell.

Vest Point. In Port Washington, Wis., when John Jushka sent out his Irish setter on the first day of its training as a retriever, the dog came back with a wallet containing $60.

Candid. In Manila, there were no takers for a $25 prize offered to any man at a National Press Club gathering who had a picture of his mother-in-law with him.

Scoop. In Morristown, N.J., a headline in the Record called attention to a trend: MARRIAGES WANE, BIRTHS FOLLOW.

Careless Wiver. In Detroit, Hartwell Johnson won a divorce after testifying that his wife used her maiden name, went around introducing him as her chauffeur.

Hear No Evil. In Topeka, Kans., when Federal District Judge Arthur Stanley told a witness to "speak up," a juror broke in to say: "It doesn't matter, your honor; I wasn't listening anyhow."

Self-Starter. In Fauquier County, Va., Irving Hanback published a legal notice in the Fauquier Democrat: "I will not be responsible for any more charge accounts made by me or my wife."

Ground Stroke. In Windsor Locks, Conn., when the cops made broad insinuations about Kaston Gailius by testifying in court that when they nabbed him, his eyes were watery, his face was flushed and he could not pick up a coin from the floor, Gailius won an acquittal by explaining that sinus trouble had made him teary, he had been sunburned, and he was exhausted from a game of tennis.

Addlescence. In Segoville, Texas, Mae Hancock went to police and asked them to arrest her two boys because "I can't do a thing with them," the cops went to the Hancock house, found Warden, 54, and Guy, 52, sprawled out drunk in the carport.

Brooched Subject. In Piedade, Brazil, Pastor Francisco Antonio de Oliveira preached against feminine vanity and feminine adornments, was pelted with earrings and brooches.

Destroyer Escort. In Claremore, Okla., two bootleggers transporting 96 gal. of whisky in their 1958 car were caught despite 1) a carpet tack dispenser between the rear wheels, 2) a trap door designed to dump 10 Ibs. of tacks on the road in deeper emergencies, and 3) a pressurized oil tank that produced a thick smoke screen from the exhaust.

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