Figure 9. Near St. Catharines, Ont., wearing only boots and skates, 44 members of a nudist colony went skating.

99.44 Proof. In Fairforest, S.C., Hoyle Ridings was caught sitting naked in a tubful of whisky that was gurgling down the drain, told the cops he knew nothing about any liquor, was only taking a bath.

Pubtrahend. In London, police asked a motorist to subtract seven from 100, booked him for drunken driving when he said: "135."

Drainbow. In Cranbrook, B.C., Roy E. Webb went to find out why his toilet tank would not fill with water, found a 6-in. trout wrapped around the valve.

Hoodonym. In Newcastle-on-Tyne, England, Henry Holland went to jail after he told a court that he had lived in 31 hotels without paying a bill, stole from five of them, always registered as "Mr. Crook."

Aero motion. Near Monroe, Wis., after Pilot Carl Anderson fell asleep at the controls, his light plane circled for some minutes, landed--by itself and with almost no damage--on a gravel road.

Good Chops. In Hereford, England, when an infants' school class was told to come in one day dressed in costumes suitable for a world pageant, every child showed up wearing a cowboy outfit.

Postage Due. In Niagara Falls, Ont., G. E. French received a letter from Toronto which bore a 1-c- King George VI stamp and the slogan, SAVE METAL, RAGS AND WASTE PAPER, had been mailed on April 21, 1943.

Small Fry. In New Iberia, La., state game agents donated to public school lunchrooms four tons of confiscated undersized shrimp.

Roof & Horn. In Oxford, England, the South Oxford Hunt's seven hounds chased a fox into Mrs. Evelyn Lindley's living room, killed it on her new carpet; and in Minehead, the local hunt club's hounds followed a fox to the front door of the Beaconwood Hotel, killed it there, shocking the guests and the owner, who said indignantly: "This is a vegetarian hotel."

Bull's-Eye View. In Salt Lake City, after Mrs. Agnes Haynes complained that cops surrounded her car on a downtown street, searched her as an armed-robbery suspect and left without apology while a crowd looked on, Police Chief W. C. Skousen issued a proclamation telling all citizens that if they should find themselves in a similar situation, they should "accept the inconvenience as an exceptional opportunity to observe how police function when apprehending a criminal."

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