Hyland's Hoerna is Swedish TV's weekly family funfest, attracting about 40% of the nation's 7.8 million population to its low-key grab bag of chatter, mystery guests, songs and good cheer.

For a special Christmas treat, the program invited Actor Per Oscarsson, 40, (Hunger, The Doll) to talk awhile to the folks. "It's so warm in here," said Oscarsson, doffing his jacket. Moving on to tie and shirt, he explained that clothes should be worn only to ward off the cold. Per next removed his pants, discoursing the while on how mamma and pappa make babies. Standing up in two-piece long Johns as the monologue continued, Per fiddled with the waistband, finally pulled them off to reveal--a pair of shorts. As viewers gripped their armchairs, the shorts came off too, disclosing a striped bathing suit. "I'm just an impulsive person by nature," said Oscarsson.

Mother and Dad looked on beamishly from a pink-and-silver box high above the floor, and the orchestra burst into America the Beautiful. With that, Julie Nixon, 17, younger daughter of the former Vice President, stepped forward into the Grand Ballroom of Manhattan's Waldorf-Astoria Hotel to make the first curtsy at this season's International Debutante Ball. Her sister Patricia had preceded her by two years as the U.S. representative at the gala, which presented 56 debs from twelve nations. Julie, a Smith College freshman, may have one-upped her sister in the escort department. At her side stood David Eisenhower, 18, Ike's only grandson, now a freshman at Amherst.

There are bird watchers and bee watchers, satellite watchers and girl watchers--in fact, watchers for just about everything. But Mrs. Charles Black, 38, once known as Shirley Temple, belongs in a category all her own.

"I'm an operation watcher," she explained to the New York Times. It started when Shirley was 14, visiting an army hospital in Oregon. "A boy asked me to be with him while his leg was amputated. I held his hand the entire time, and since then have watched many operations. Gall bladders are the best--the colors are gorgeous!"

In keeping with his practice since he was first elected to public office as a Chicago alderman 26 years ago, Illinois' Democratic Senator Paul H. Douglas, 74, defeated for re-election by Republican Charles Percy, ended the year with an accounting of his income and financial holdings. Taxes, campaign expenses and other costs of maintaining office left only some $7,000 of his total $32,385 Senate salary-plus-allowance to live on, Douglas declared, and it would have been "very difficult" to remain in public life but for the $8,285 he earned from royalties, articles and lecture fees.

Concluded Douglas: "I think the vast majority of people do not fully realize how heavy the expenses of political office really are."

The Kennedys of Massachusetts may be a mighty clan, but the Udalls of Arizona are a whole private army.

Founded by a pious Mormon who reached Arizona in 1880, the Udalls now total some 400. Last week about 175 of them showed up in Mesa, Arizona, from as far away as Missouri and California for a weekend of picnicking, dancing, camping and familial yakking. U.S. Interior Secretary Stewart Udall and his brother Morris, U.S.

Congressman from Arizona, were snowbound in Washington; but those who made it included their uncle Jesse, an Arizona Supreme Court justice, plus eight Udall lawyers, five judges, two law students, seven doctors, two medical students, four mayors or former mayors, and one city manager.

As a duenna of young lovers, Actress Merle Oberon, 47, has been a smashing success. Look what happened after she chaperoned Frankie and Mia. Now Merle and her husband, Industrialist Bruno Pagliai, have another pair to encourage: Lynda Bird Johnson, 22, and George Hamilton, 27, who flew to Acapulco to spend a private vacation at the Pagliais' seaside villa. A small army of reporters and photographers besieged the villa, and another army of guards kept the newsmen at bay. A truce was arranged, with George assembling the press and laying down the ground rules. "There will be no answer to the Big Question," said he. Someone asked about their marriage plans anyway. "This is a very personal question," said George, "and we will keep it personal."

If he had the deed to do all over again, would he attempt it? "Yes! And how!" bellowed Prince Felix Youssoupoff, 79, the man who murdered czarist Russia's lecherous holy man Rasputin. Brave talk. The prince was nearly dead on his feet after he had dispatched the wild monk by feeding him enough cyanide to kill a regiment of Cossacks, blasting him with a revolver, beating him with a rubber truncheon, and dumping him into the Neva River. Now, 50 years after the murder, the prince will have the pleasure of watching someone else do the job. His recent book, The End of Rasputin, is being filmed near the prince's home in Paris, with English Actor Peter McEnery giving the fatal mugging to Gert (Goldfinger) Frobe.

"I offer this Mass to you as a personal gift," said San Juan's Archbishop Luis Aponte Martinez. "What else could I or the church offer you that could be of any value?" In response, two threads of tears appeared on the cheeks of Cellist Pablo Casals, celebrating his 90th birthday. After the service, the maestro returned with his 30-year-old wife Marta and a small group of friends to his seaside villa, where he opened hundreds of gifts and cables from all over the world. Casals' birthday festival in San Juan lasted two days, ending with a commemoratory concert, a formal party at the Governor's palace, and the tranquil comment from Casals: "I am happy to have arrived at this age still being a little useful."

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