Friday, Mar. 28, 1969
Agnew Ascendant
On his way to becoming a household word, Spiro T. Agnew learned that lampoonery is the most devastating weapon in the political armory. "Look what's happened to me," the new Vice President complained to a friend shortly before the Inauguration. "Six months ago I was a fairly popular and successful Governor. Now I'm being called the village idiot."
Indeed, Ted Agnew's gift of gaffe in spired gagwriters from beautiful down town Burbank to catty midtown Manhattan. Democrats dubbed him "Zorba the Veep." The Washington cocktail circuit relayed countless gags about him.
They ranged from the line about Mickey Mouse wearing a Spiro Agnew watch to the unkindest cut of all -- that he was the only Greek since Achilles to make a heel a campaign issue.
Of late, however, Agnew has demonstrated a surprising ability to turn the shaft in his favor. Having already won grudging admiration from his critics for his tireless efforts to learn his job, the Vice President delighted two of Washington's most capricious dinner audiences by delivering some of the best political punchlines heard in a long time. Although most of the gags are credited to Laugh-In Writer Paul Keyes, Agnew dropped his lines with professional aplomb, obviously relishing the blend of self-deprecatory humor and sly pokes at his boss.
With the Tour. Agnew talked about the prestige of having his own plane ("It's Air Force 13, and it's a glider"), of having access to the White House at any time ("I come in the front door --with the regular tour.") and his thor ough policy briefings ("Right now I'm studying the AMB.").
He confided to the White House Radio and Television Correspondents' dinner that the President had tried to discourage him from ad-libbing his speech, suggesting that he should recite only his name, rank and serial number in stead. Said Agnew: "Well, I told him I thought I ought to say something more important than that, and he looked at me again. And, you know, for a minute there I thought I had a glimpse of the old Nixon."
He told the Gridiron Club dinner that Nixon had urged him to get on TV interview shows, and had the White House staff schedule appearances. Said Agnew: "I'll be on Meet the Press, opposite the Army-Navy game; on Face the Nation opposite General de Gaulle's arrival at the White House; and on Issues and Answers opposite live coverage of Julie and David's surprise party for Ted Kennedy -- at the ranch." But Nix on also promised him, he said, "that when he's ready to recognize Red China, he'll let me announce it."
Cram Course. Obviously, a string of well-delivered punchlines is hardly a qualification for a Vice President trying to measure up to a job that has such awesome contingencies. All the same, the results have bolstered Ag new's morale and his prestige. (As of last week, he was receiving 40 to 50 in vitations a day to make speeches.) In fact, the first 60 days of the Admin istration have been a deadly serious time for Agnew, who, while cramming for his new role, burst a blood vessel in his right eye. Although he is the first Vice President since Henry Wallace who has not ascended from the Senate, Agnew has won generous praise from both Democratic and Republican members for a job well done as President of the Upper Chamber. On the Hill and with in the federal Establishment, the word is beginning to trickle back: "Agnew isn't what we thought. He's sincere and doing his homework."
Perhaps the person least surprised by the pickup in Agnew's fortunes is the Vice President himself: "I didn't come to this office unsophisticated, even though my image may have arrived that way." If Agnew, through a diligent application of hard work and good humor, can keep up the momentum of his ascendance, he may enjoy the lon gest laugh of all -- the last.
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