Briefs

LETHAL LITTLE OLD LADY

"I love to drive!" says Gertrude Karmiol, 81, of Miami Beach, Fla. But she does it badly. According to the police, three months ago she plowed into a bench at a crowded bus stop, killing three people and injuring five others; when told of the deaths, she remarked, "How nice." Furthermore, she had already had two accidents in recent years in which three more had been hurt. Her license had not been lifted because she had not been convicted of anything in the first two cases; this time she is charged only with "careless driving resulting in death" (maximum punishment: $500 fine) because there is no evidence that she knew what she was doing. The real problem, say authorities, is that Florida's licensing laws are not tough enough on elderly drivers, some of whom have lost control. Last week Roland Slatzer, 80, was paroled after serving one year for running down and killing three girls playing at the edge of a street in Naples. As for Karmiol, she is finally off the highway, but only because a prosecutor found a dusty rule allowing a retest of her driving skills. Rather than take it, she gave up her license.

ARMED GUARDS FOR THE JUSTICES

"Are we not hostages within the borders of our own self-styled enlightened, civilized country?" asked Chief Justice Warren Burger in a speech last year. He was talking generally about violent crime and the criminal justice system. But like other citizens, he is personally worried. Among the hostages, Burger is now suggesting, are the nine members of the Supreme Court. In a memo to key Congressmen, the chief endorsed legislation authorizing the 71-member Supreme Court police force to carry guns off court property while accompanying the Justices or performing other duties. Threats against judges are on the rise nationally, and some have been made against the Justices, including two against Sandra Day O'Connor. So the extra protection looks good. Says Justice Thurgood Marshall: "I'd accept it. I'd rather not get killed."

THE BIRDMEN OF NEVADA STATE

The rumor had been circulating at Nevada State Prison in Carson City for nearly five years, but no one took it seriously. Finally, the new warden dispatched a special security squad to check it out. Sure enough, there in the prison shop were a three-wheel gocart, a motorcycle engine, a rear rotor blade--in short, more or less everything needed to build a helicopter except the main overhead blade. The criminal masterminds were a welder, a plumber and an electrician serving long sentences in maximum security. Warden George Sumner contends that the plot would never have flown anyway: "If they had tried to take off, they were right in front of Tower One here, and they would've been shot down."

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