Most of the Decade

Most Bullish Stock Market. Hardly daunted by such trifling matters as the 1987 crash, the Tokyo Stock Exchange zoomed to 38,040 points on the Nikkei average last week, a gain of 500% from the start of the decade. By comparison, Wall Street's Dow Jones average rose 240%.

Sorriest Dealmaker. All's fair in love and takeover war, or so thought Texaco. In 1984 the Lone Star oil giant pined for Getty Oil, even though that company had already pledged its hand to another suitor, Pennzoil. Texaco managed to seduce Getty with a sweeter offer, but the jilted Pennzoil persuaded a Dallas jury that it had been cheated. To avoid posting a $10 billion bond, Texaco had to declare bankruptcy. Eventually the company settled the dispute by wiring $3 billion to Pennzoil's bank account.

Winningest Products. Good things came in small sizes: Chicken McNuggets, Chrysler minivans, 3M's Post-it notes. Health was hot: Nike Air shoes, oat bran and Diet Coke. But old reliables stole the show: Waring blenders, fountain pens, Etch A Sketches, convertibles, suspenders and condoms.

Biggest Letdowns. Kodak's disk cameras took fuzzy pictures. RJR's Premier, the so-called smokeless cigarette, tasted like burning plastic. New Coke wasn't the real thing. The Pontiac Fiero caught on fire, literally, then flamed out. Home banking via personal computer was for nerds. All-suite hotels went up, then stood vacant. And portfolio insurance may have helped cause the crash.

Humblest Billionaires. Pickup-truck-driving Sam Walton, 69, built his Wal-Mart discount chain from 276 stores at the decade's start to 1,379 locations by the end. When the '87 crash temporarily erased $2 billion of his personal fortune, he quipped, "It's paper anyway. It was paper when we started, and it's paper afterward." Warren Buffett, 59, the cowlicked Oracle of Omaha, built a $7 billion fortune on Wall Street by investing the old-fashioned way: buying stock and holding it. Said Buffett: "The market, like the Lord, helps those who help themselves."

Most Applauded Corporate Response to a Disaster. After seven people died from poisoned Tylenol in 1982, Johnson & Johnson Chairman James Burke quickly recalled 31 million bottles of the pain killer and offered a $100,000 reward for the culprit. His frank, decisive response won back customer loyalty, and is now a textbook case in public relations. Least applauded: Exxon's tar- footed response to its desecration of Alaska's shoreline.

Least Timely Utterance. RJR Nabisco chief Ross Johnson, who was proposing a $25 billion buyout of the company, stood to make $100 million on the deal but failed to show much sympathy for the employees who might be transferred or laid off. They had, he said, "very portable types of professions." RJR's board decided Johnson did too. They fired him, after selling the company instead to leveraged-buyout specialists Kohlberg Kravis Roberts.

Most Overworked Employees. Under straw boss Michael Eisner, the Disney characters Mickey, Minnie, Goofy, Snow White and the rest of the gang toiled overtime to plug everything from telephones to hamburgers to Chevrolets. When asked where he would take a vacation, if he ever gets one, Mickey replied, "Anywhere but Orlando."

Healthiest of Intentions. In the beginning was Nautilus, followed by aerobics, dancercize, StairMaster and NordicTrack. With subliminal promises of immortality, the fitness craze turned into a $25 billion industry. Meanwhile, an estimated 34 million Americans are overweight and still expanding.

Buzz Words Most Ready for Early Retirement. Upside potential, upscale marketing, fast-tracker, bottom line, synergy, networking, streamlining, interfacing, prioritizing quality time, soft landing, hands-on manager, power player, power breakfast, power tie, power anything.