A FOOL AND HIS MONEY

By Jack E. White

What a pity that the Clinton administration won't let Louis Farrakhan accept either a $1 billion gift or the $250,000 that went along with the human-rights award he got from Libyan strongman Muammar Gaddafi last week. Unless the Nation of Islam leader manages to overturn the decision in court, we'll never know how he would have behaved as the world's first black billionaire flake. Assuming Gaddafi actually intended to hand over the loot, it would have been quite a show.

With money like that, Farrakhan could have taught H. Ross Perot and the late Howard Hughes a thing or two about eccentricity. He shares Perot's elephantine ego, endless self-righteousness, grandiose political ambitions and deep-seated belief that people are plotting against him. Some of his notions--like the mystical importance of the number 19 and his claim to have taken trips on alien spacecraft--are as cockamamie as Hughes' obsession with germs. As far as I know, neither Perot nor Hughes ever pretended to speak on behalf of God. For Farrakhan and his followers, such miracles are strictly routine.

For example, on Aug. 16 one of Farrakhan's top aides, Minister Tony Muhammad, prophesied that within 30 days "the wrath of God will show itself in a major earthquake" because the Muslims had been evicted from their Western regional headquarters in Inglewood, California. This may be the first time since the Old Testament that anyone has called on the Lord to get involved in a real estate dispute--and set a deadline for his seismic intervention.

Even without Gaddafi's largesse, Farrakhan has a good deal of familiarity with the life-styles of the rich and famous. He has big houses in Chicago's Hyde Park and the Arizona desert, a chauffeur-driven Mercedes-Benz and a killer wardrobe. And if his ego ever needs a boost, there are plenty of sycophants around to give in to his demands. Two weeks ago, several hundred of my fellow members of the National Association of Black Journalists meekly permitted Farrakhan's Fruit of Islam to frisk them before they entered the hall where he was speaking--an indignity the Secret Service does not inflict on those who are visiting the President of the U.S. Then they cheered enthusiastically as Farrakhan denounced black reporters who work for the white press as "slaves." Even though the overwhelming majority of N.A.B.J. members work for the white media, they gave Farrakhan a standing ovation. I decided not to check my self-respect at the door and passed up the speech.

While Farrakhan's bank account may not be any bigger when he returns from his latest powwow with Gaddafi, his ego will be inflamed. He plans to address an African-American political summit in St. Louis, Missouri, later this month, followed by a World's Day of Atonement on Oct. 16, the anniversary of the Million Man March (which incidentally wound up $66,000 in the hole, according to the Nation of Islam's calculations). One can only hope most people will ignore both events, but that hope is probably in vain. African Americans are so starved for inspiring leadership that many confuse Farrakhan with a hero. If he ever gets his hands on really big bucks, his throng will swell even more.