"DEEP DOWN IN MY HEART I KNOW WHAT'S TRUE"
By JOHN DICKERSON, Kevin Fedarko
In her first interview since accepting the general discharge, Kelly Flinn, with her brother Don in attendance, spoke to TIME correspondents John Dickerson and Kevin Fedarko on Saturday at the Holiday Inn in Minot, N.D. Throughout, she kept consulting a personal datebook but spoke calmly and with little rancor, even as she reasserted that Marc Zigo was to blame for her downfall. The only show of emotion came after she was asked what position she played in soccer ("I've always been a halfback"). When the next question was Marc Zigo's position, she sighed, closed her eyes and looked down at the floor, shaking her head. Then she looked up and said with bemused disgust, "He's a striker." Excerpts:
On her punishment: I have never, ever implied to anyone that I should get off scot-free. I even admitted in my letter to [Air Force] Secretary [Sheila] Widnall that I made mistakes and that a form of punishment should be rendered because of this. It should have been handled much differently, in the nonjudicial system.
On what punishment she had hoped for: I was hoping to be given an Article 15 [an administrative disciplinary action that ranges from reprimands to reductions in rank]. Then I could salute smartly, get Marc Zigo the hell out of my life and move on. I wouldn't have to live under his threats anymore.
On the breakup of the Zigos' marriage: What has not been mentioned was that there was another woman involved with Marc Zigo. That woman is the one who confronted Gayla Zigo on the evening of Marc's suicide attempt. Gayla then called Marc, and they got into a fight, and that was the night that Marc did his suicide attempt, on a Saturday night. By Sunday morning, Dec. 1, Gayla moved out of the house and still didn't know about me. She didn't know about me until midnight around Dec. 2. So she had already been separated from him because of another woman.
On Marc Zigo's charisma: Within one week of meeting me, he told me he was in love with me and he would follow me anywhere. He said, "A feeling like this only comes around once in a lifetime, and you should seize it." The whole family was swept up by him. My nieces loved him. My sister, who was doing her best not to like him, said within five minutes of meeting him she couldn't help but like him.
On the release of her letters by Gayla Zigo: The story isn't complete. The reason why I accepted the resignation rather than go to court-martial was that it would save myself, my family and the Air Force and everyone that is involved in this case, including Airman Zigo, the embarrassment. It's just not necessary for everybody to be out there reading these lurid details about my private thoughts or some of the things I know went on in other relationships. I am the one who lived it, and deep down in my heart I know what's true, and there's no reason for me to get upset about everyone else's twists on this plot.
On the Air Force: I still believe in the institution. It's very unfortunate the way they handled my case. I would love to be able to continue to serve my country. I would love to be able to continue flying. Yeah, I'm gonna try to keep flying within my life, whether it's as an instructor, as a civilian or for a commercial airline. I don't know. We'll see.
On how she is coping: I've lost my innocence, and I've lost my ability to trust people in general and anyone and anything. In time, I guess, those wounds will heal, but right now that's where I am.
On what lessons her case holds for others: There's not necessarily a message for any other women. It's just a message to anybody in the Air Force that you need to think of people as human beings and realize they are subject to human mistakes and human errors. I hope that I didn't go through this for naught and that there will be some reconsideration--that people [will] reconsider how they should apply punishment.
On what lessons she learned: [Laughing] I think the next person I date is going to have to be fingerprinted and have a full background check.