Charles Grodin

By Joel Stein

Charles Grodin's talk show has been canceled by CNBC. We talked to him as soon as we heard the news.

Q: I'm sorry.

A: Is that a question?

Q: Yeah.

A: O.K. So it's not necessarily a question with a question mark at the end of it?

Q: I can raise my voice a little bit at the end of it if you want.

A: That's O.K. Well, I'm not sorry. I think in a fairly short amount of time I'll be in a situation that will be a very good one for me.

Q: Like another talk show?

A: Well, something where I get to talk.

Q: So the talking is the important part?

A: Yeah. This mime thing just didn't work for me.

Q: CNBC didn't really let Charles be Charles, huh?

A: They did. They never censored me. They never even criticized me. They just canceled me. I don't see how you turn this into a Q&A.

Q: I'm kind of worried about that right now myself. You ever think maybe the reason you got canceled was because you wore too much makeup?

A: No question that was a factor. But I wanted to get a lot.

Q: Because it was probably free, right?

A: Yeah. I started to get some hints when they said we don't have any more.

Q: So what are you going to do for money now?

A: Well, that's what I wanted to talk to you about. It is TIME magazine.

Q: There's nothing here, man.

A: I remember when that thing cost a quarter, so you guys must be socking it away. There's no dogs in my future, if that's what you're getting at.

Q: Did you swear off acting?

A: Yeah. I swore off it.

Q: It's not fun or not important?

A: Not enough makeup.

--By Joel Stein