Jennifer Lopez

By Joel Stein

Jennifer Lopez has a role in the animated film Antz.

A: They warned me about you.

Q: What did they say?

A: That you're really fun.

Q: That's not really what they said. And it may not be your kind of fun. So you know ants isn't really spelled with a z?

A: No. I didn't know that. Thanks.

Q: Is it the street version of ants?

A: The main character's name is Z.

Q: So are you like a hot little ant?

A: I don't know if I see her as sexy. She starts off being part of the team and not being much of an individual thinker.

Q: Did Marky Mark gross you out at the MTV video awards?

A: Because he came out looking at my butt and everything?

Q: Yeah. He seemed kind of slimy.

A: He was, in his way, trying to give me a compliment. He's a really nice guy. I didn't take offense at it. A lot of people talk about my butt and my body.

Q: Yeah, what's the big deal with your booty?

A: It's big.

Q: But in a good way, right?

A: Yeah. I think so. I'm not trying to get rid of it. I'm not fasting.

Q: It's just that I don't know anything about butts.

A: Do you like butts or not?

Q: Yeah. Sure. But I don't know what makes a good one. I've always faked it when talking to other guys.

A: Well, what do you like when you look at it? You like it smaller? You like bigger? You like it rounder? You like it when it's flat? You like it where you almost don't see it? You like when you really see it? It's personal preference.

Q: Oh.

A: In general, ethnic men like big butts.

Q: Do you do all your interviews like this, on your bed?

A: No, not always. I like it to be casual.

Q: Yeah. Me too.

--By Joel Stein