TV Dads: Who Brings Home How Much Bacon

By Harriet Barovick, Michelle Derrow, Tam Gray, Daniel Levy, Lina Lofaro, David Spitz, Flora Tartakovsky and Chris Taylor

They give us life, we give them soap-on-a-rope. Yep, Father's Day is here again. Brookstone, which purveys titanium ear-hair trimmers and anti-snore nasal dilators, among other innovative gifts, commemorated this year by ranking sitcom pops' earning power. The company used the most recent salary data from the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics and human-resource firms to determine the yearly salaries (in 1999 dollars) of 25 of America's TV breadwinners. The Top 5 and Bottom 5:

1) Jed Clampett (The Beverly Hillbillies); oil tycoon; $1.75 million

2) Philip Drummond (Diff'rent Strokes); CEO; $839,000

3) Tim Taylor (Home Improvement); cable TV-show host; $233,000

4) Cliff Huxtable (The Cosby Show); obstetrician; $200,000

5) Jason Seaver (Growing Pains); psychiatrist; $119,000

21) Archie Bunker (All in the Family); dock foreman; $31,104

22) Andy Taylor (The Andy Griffith Show); small-town sheriff; $26,700

23) Fred Flintstone (The Flintstones); crane operator; $26,448

24) Dan Conner (Roseanne); small contractor; $17,856

25) Al Bundy (Married...with Children); shoe salesman; $15,748