People

By Josh Tyrangiel

BEEN AWAY. ANYBODY MISS ME?

What are people so afraid of? Sure, MARION (SUGE) KNIGHT, man-mountain CEO of Death Row Records, was released from an Oregon prison last week after serving five years for probation violation. But--discounting incidents in which Knight is alleged to have dangled rapper Vanilla Ice from a 15th-floor balcony and forced a record promoter to drink his urine--could a man nicknamed Sugar Bear really be so scary? Proving he wasn't blinded by rage, Knight told reporters, "The first thing I did was fire me up a nice cigar." Then he hit the Dairy Queen "and got me a cheeseburger." Knight told the L.A. Times, "I guess God kept me in five years because he felt I had a lot to learn." Maybe so, though prison grammar classes aren't all they're cracked up to be. (Please don't kill me.)

SMOKIN' TUNES

Sir-Mix-A-Lot liked big butts, and he could not lie. AFROMAN likes marijuana, and he's not lying either. Afroman's tribute to pot, Because I Got High, from the soon-to-be-released album The Good Times, is the most requested track at countless radio stations around the country. Afroman--actually Joseph Foreman, 27--admits to smoking illegal substances occasionally. "But you know," he says, "my character, Afroman, he really does." Of course, it's a novelty hit and performance art. Afroman had no idea his ode would be so successful, and he displays an endearing concern for parental sensitivities. "You know what, dude? I made this tape for all my homeboys. I didn't think I'd be talking to TIME magazine. I'm a little worried about Rush Limbaugh and Newt Gingrich. I don't want to get anybody riled up. I just figured, since I'm a pothead, why can't me and the other potheads have a little joke between ourselves." Boozers shouldn't feel left out. Afroman has also recorded a song called Let's All Get Drunk.

SWEATING FOR THEIR ART

New Yorkers are not crazy simply because they live in tiny boxes and pay mansion prices. They are crazy because hundreds of them a night are willing to camp out in record heat for free theater tickets. The occasion is an all-star production of Chekhov's The Seagull in Central Park, starring KEVIN KLINE, MERYL STREEP, John Goodman, Marcia Gay Harden, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Natalie Portman and Christopher Walken. But if Chekhov knew how a man of Goodman's girth can sweat, he might have written in a Towel Boy character. In a week when temperatures soared to 103[degrees]F, the actors could at least retreat to air-conditioned dressing rooms between scenes. The audience happily endured it all, giving the performers standing ovations.

Creaking Down The Catwalk

There's no denying it. At 36, LINDA EVANGELISTA is one old biddy. But give her credit. After several years of voluntary retirement from the fashion world, Evangelista has somehow managed to pull it all together for a comeback, gracing the cover of September's monstrous, 3-lb. 13.7-oz. issue of Vogue. (The magazine costs more to mail--$6.45--than to buy--$3.95--and weighs more than several of the models featured inside.) "We're very excited," says Vogue editor in chief Anna Wintour of Evangelista's return. "We've been having an ongoing conversation with Linda for some time, letting her know that if she wanted to come back, we would love to have her." Wintour adds that industry response to Evangelista's return has been strong. "All the designers have been calling me, saying, 'Can't you persuade her to do our campaigns?' and 'Will she do the runway?'" Evangelista, who left modeling after some shaky runway performances in 1998, isn't talking about why she returned or what her future plans are. Presumably, she's just happy to show she can still walk unassisted.