Do You Really Want to Marry?

By Andrea Sachs

Susan Piver doesn't want you to take the plunge before reading The Hard Questions: 100 Essential Questions to Ask Before You Say "I Do" (Tarcher/Putnam). This slim best seller recommends that couples get to know each other by working through dozens of questions about money, sex, family and even furniture ("Do we want to be free to redecorate as our tastes change, or do we expect to invest in quality that will last a lifetime?"). Some of Piver's questions are thought provoking: "How much time will each of us spend at work and during what hours? Do we begin work early? Will we prefer to work into the evening?" Others are potentially explosive: "What do you like about my family of origin? What do you dislike?" Still others require a crystal ball: "When our child is a baby, will she/he be breast-fed? For how long? Will we adhere to a strict feeding schedule or not?" It's a nice antidote to instamatch TV-reality shows like The Bachelorette. But if you follow all this book's advice, your relationship may suddenly feel like homework. --By Andrea Sachs